make mine a double espresso...

• for my single ladies!

  Posted: April 29, 2010, 6:46 am by kahawamoto

  loneliness
  independence
  solitude
  
  There is a thin line between the three. i won't refer to the dictionary for this post. Off the top of my head;
  
  Loneliness - i wish there was another body in my bed/someone to watch this movie with
  Independence - no thanks dude, i'll get a cab
  Solitude - lemmi put a nice play list and clean the house/ painting your nails while smiling to yourself...
  
  Again, just off the top of my head. Ya'll can refer to Oxford or Webster. That's the name of the other dictionary right? Webster?
  
  Aaanywho, sad part is, so many women (and men) i'm trying to be gender friendly but me thinks it's very unlikely for men, go through so much shit to avoid loneliness, would rather be with some dodgey character and unhappy, than be by themselves. The fear of loneliness. It's sad, but i'm not judging.
  
  "I may be alone, but never lonely" i think it was one Miss India Arie who coined that phrase, love her music by the way, i'm actually following her on twitter. But before i digress further, THAT IS A LOAD OF BULL. Loneliness always manages to stick it's foot in the door from time to time. Especially for the ladies, in my view, you know because of the estrogen, and we all get the 'I wish there was another body in my bed' feeling. (Especially when it rains. Doesn't help that it's raining right now, and i'm writing this at 3am...) And if we don't get distracted, we start doing stupid things like going through all our exes facebook profiles and sending random unnecessary inboxes in the name of checking up (guilty!) if any of my exes read this, hahaha! Yeah, i was checking on you, whatever nigga! :p
  
  Ladies, what you need to do is get a distraction. Fast! Quick even. Don't listen to slow music or watch romatic films, don't focus on the void. DO NOT listen to Sade, that woman's music almost finished me! It just makes shit worse. Don't facebook/twitter stalk the ex, like you don't know the reason why ya'll didn't work out in the first place! Don't look at pictures of his current squeeze and convince yourself that you are better looking... You know you is though! (damn you world wide web)
  
  Watch a comedy, join yet another social networking site, preferably one that aforementioned ex is not on, (you can never join too many social networking sites) -i'm a junkie. Put on some sexy heels and go dancing/for cocktails, don't sulk in the house because other negative stuff will catch up to you, like the extra slice of pizza you had for lunch (guilty!) go out, have fun!
  
  Better focus on independence and solitude.
  That's my two cents.

• the 'hoe code' and ex fat chicks

  Posted: April 18, 2010, 10:53 pm by kahawamoto

  First i only used the term 'Hoe' in the title beacuse it rhymes with bro, and also because of the whole 'bros before hoes thing' so it has already been established.
  And i do know that it's spelt W-H-O-R-E i just don't like how that spelling looks in print. So let's go with H-O-E.
  
  I was asking some of my tweeps (twitter buddies) whether there are any rules regarding a girl dating a guy who one of her friends has slept with. Not dated, just slept with. (chibo). I'm gonna assume we've all seen how I met your mother, how Barney is always going on about the bro code. Is there some kind of code for girls???
  Like in the above situation. Some of the responses i got on twitter were
  
  "i don't see why not as long as there were no feelings"
  "even if i wanted to, I don't want my pals knowing things that only i'm meant to know"
  "it's never that serious"
  "bff's mess with each other's chipoz on the regular, it makes no sense. But guys divide and plough"
  
  i think that it could work, a girl dating a friends ex-chibo, if neither of them caught feelings after the chipsing, and if they aren't interested in each other. After all, everyone has a sexual history so it's bound to happen. (6 degrees of separation)
  
  Ooh, another thing, i'm still on this 'Hoe-Code'. I know guys occasionally use the wing man thing to Mack on girls at the club, to try chibo or whatever but do girls do the same? From the dudes side, if a guy wants to hit some girl, but she's stuck to her less attractive friend, his wingman will try diffuse the situation, and if need be entertain, chill with her, while his boy tries to get laid. Totally understandable. i admire that kind of loyalty. :)
  Would girls do the same in that situation? Be a wingwoman/wing girl (???) -the term doesn't even sound right.
  
  Is a girl, expected to chill with a guy she's not feeling, just because her friend is trying to chibo his boy? Discuss. (20 marks) lol.
  
  Seriously though. I was in such a situation this weekend and ugh... That whole awkwardness could have been avoided if she had told me the plan before. It worked out to her advantage though. I don't mind helping a friend get hers but gosh...
  
  
  This is just a thought in passing;
  Why is it that it takes so long for esteems of ex fat chicks to catch up??? Okay, i don't mean to generalise because, putting some thought into it, i know some ex fat chicks who had shitty esteem, dropped the weight, became pretty confident and are now borderline bitchy, which btw is fine. If you wanna be a bitch, by all means, do you boo boo.
  But the ones who still do stupid things like sleep with guys who are waaay below standards, come on ladies. There's never a need!
  
  
  Peace and Love.

• 10 reasons why she won't answer/return your calls...

  Posted: April 14, 2010, 7:36 pm by kahawamoto

  
  
  This post was inspired by a Kenyan Trending Topic (TT) on Twitter which my friend started. The name of the TT was “I hate how Kenyan guys…” or something like that.
  Then yesterday, I stumbled upon a blog, and the latest post on it was “10 reasons why he won’t call you back”.
  Now that props have been given to the things that inspired me, here are, in no particular order, some of the reasons why she won’t call you back. Specially done for my Kenyan ladies.
  
  PLEASE CALL ME. THANKYOU .Your idea of a first phone call is a Please Call Me. – FAIL! If you can’t even afford a bamba 20, the future of the endeavour looks bleak. Not that we’re all gold diggers but c’mon…
  
  WE NI NANI? She can’t remember who you are. This one happens more often that you think. You chill till the girl is crazy wasted at the club then you go pestering her for her number, which you get coz she’z clearly too drunk to lie. The next morning, the conversation goes like
  Him: hello, sema…
  Her: ummm, who’s this
  Him: it’s Davo, from last night…
  Her: okaaaay… who gave you this number?
  What follows is awkwardness. But more likely than not, she won’t ever pick/ return your calls again.
  
  PLAYA. You asked for her, her cousins, her friend’s and some other random chick’s number. Not that keeping your options open is a bad thing, just be slick about it. Jheeze! -but there are some chick who’ll want to fight for the guy’s attention. (we’ll discuss esteem and daddy issues another day).
  
  STALKER. You call her 5 times in the first 24 hours after receiving her number. Can you spell stalker? Y.O.U! your number will be deleted so quickly plus you’ll be black balled to all her friends.
  
  SHIT TO DO. It’s self explanatory, but for the sake of. I’ll explain. She’s got shit to do.
  
  “SHORTCOMINGS” she let you get it once and it was a disappointment. Not so much the technique, that can always be worked on. It was more an issue of the size of the package. I know, it’s a low blow, but it’s a valid reason. No sex is better than bad sex.
  
  XOXO, GOSSIP GIRL. There’s someone saying very unflattering thing s about you and it got to her. You know women and gossip. Not to generalize but come on…
  
  HER BOYFRIEND... dude. she has a dude.
  
  KENCHIC you've been dating a month and all you've done is go to kenchic and the local. no offense to kenchic and the locals. there's nothing like a quarter chicken and chips at 6am after a hectic hanye, but c'mon... not ati she's a gold digger. we just wanna be treated nice...
  
  ON TO THE NEXT ONE. nuff said!
  
  feel free to add on to the list. even guys. we're not trying to hate on ya'll. :)

• conflicted...

  Posted: April 13, 2010, 6:02 pm by kahawamoto

  i was still deciding whether or not to leave this blog or to just shut it down completely. i laready saved it to my hard drive but i really like the idea of having a place to vent. and overshare :) so i think i'll keep it up for now. i might change my mind tomorrow but for now it's on!
  
  i deleted some of the posts that i thought were too TMI considering it's no longer anonymous. but yeah.
  it's been a while since i've posted and my fingers are itching! i don't want to ramble thought so lemmi collect my thoughts and think of an ppropirate topic and get back to ya'll.
  
  peace and love!

Blah blah blah

Fish cakes

Alas a fish cake.

Yet more fish cakes

Guess what ... yeah ... fish cakes.

The end of the fish cakes