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You Missed This

Why Is Biwott Transferring Assets Now?

Posted: March 21, 2008, 12:25 pm by chris

When we were all busy worrying about the post election tensions and turmoil, nobody remembered to analyze exactly what happened in the last elections and especially how the giants fell. Actually one of the major shocks of last december’s general elections was the felling of political giant, Nicholas Kipyator Biwott by a nobody in his Keiyo South constituency. Jackson Kiptanui Kiplagat of ODM garnered 30,380 votes to Biwott’s paltry 9,483.

So for the first time since the late seventies, Biwott is not an MP.

Biwott's son-in-law mentioned in the Kroll report: Charles Field Marsham
But what should worry Kenyans even more is what Biwott is up to now that he is away from the political limelight and can spend much more time on his colossal business empire. The reason why Kenyans must forever be interested in Biwott is really simple but let me spell it out here. We know how Bill Gates made his money and we also know how the Rockefeller family (descendants of JOHN D. Rockefeller) made their money. Closer to home we have a pretty good idea of how Manu Chandaria came to own so many prosperous companies. Now my question is simple, How did Nicholas Biwott make his money? If I may put it bluntly he made his seed money from stealing public money and taking hefty bribes for major government projects. The Turkwell Gorge Hydroelectric project made Biwott, to name one colossal project.

Nick Biwott: Lost by over 20,000 votes

Sources inform this writer that in recent times the former Keiyo South legislator has been very busy transferring huge funds to the most unlikely of destinations. And that is Canada. The leaked Kroll report told us that the Moi’s for example have been getting pretty nervous and have transferred a lot of their funds to an African country called Namibia. We also know that if push comes to shove accounts in Switzerland and elsewhere can be frozen. So behind this backdrop why would Nicholas Biwott transfer vast sums of his ill-gotten wealth to Canada of all places?
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Converting a Born-Again During Easter

Posted: March 21, 2008, 9:56 am by Taabu

It is Good Friday today. Sister Mary Ann works with the aged in one of the church-sponsored homes in Nairobi. This Easter Friday she is driving to visiting home bound patients when all over a sudden she runs out of fuel. Luckily enough an Oil Libya petrol was just a kilometre away.

So Sister Mary Ann walks to the station to borrow a jerrycan can and buy some gas. Rasta, the attendant respectfully apologizes by telling her that the only container they owned had just been loaned out but she could wait until it was returned if she didn’t mind.

Since it was almost lunch hour and Sister Mary Ann wanted to deliver her presents over lunch, she chose not to wait and walked back to her car. She looked for any container in her car that she could use to carry fuel and spotted the bedpan she was taking to one of the beg-bound patients.

So the resourceful Sister Mary Ann carries the bedpan to the petrol station and have it filled it unleaded super fuel. She delicately balances the full bedpan back to her car and as
she pours the gas into her tank, two born-again Christians Karish and Waf watch in amazement across the street at.

Bewildered Karish turns to Waf and declares emphatically, "If the car starts, I'm converting to Catholic straightaway."
How Some MPs Are Enjoying Their Easter...

Posted: March 21, 2008, 5:27 am by chris

Indulging in Koinange street activities and dreaming big....
The Ignorance that breaks many a Marriage

Posted: March 21, 2008, 4:07 am by ritch

Are You a Thankful Being? By Ritch

How Smart is Our Prime Minister? By Wanjiku Unlimited

Introducing Dawa Ya Kumekucha (D.K.) By Chris

“David, David! We are waiting for you and your wife in the sitting room. Don’t forget to come with the proof,” George, David’s father, said loudly outside his son’s bedroom.

Assembled in the sitting room were the elders of the clan, uncles, aunts and David’s mother. The day before, they had witnessed the colourful wedding of their son to Susan, a tall beautiful lady. This is the same one they were all gathered to ‘crown’ as their ‘new’ daughter. But first, “Had she passed the acid test?”

The people gathered in the sitting room were growing impatient. David’s mother broke the silence by mumbling something about David and his wife taking too long, and shuffled her feet towards her son’s bedroom to remind them of their critical obligation to the ‘clan’!
David, in response, asked to be given two minutes for they were still preparing themselves. “Mum, you know it has been a long night. We’ve hardly slept a wink.” Even in the heat of the moment, his mother understood, or so she thought, that that was a joke and laughed heartily, in spite of herself.

“Two minutes! We don’t have the whole day here. Your uncles and aunts have to travel back to their homes today. You know what I mean.”

Inside the room, David and his wife were confused.
Read More…

Have a happy Easter!
How Smart Is Our Prime Minister?

Posted: March 21, 2008, 3:21 am by Wanjiku Unlimited

Tuesday, 18^th March, 2008 was a great day for Kenya. The President signed into LAW the Constitution of Kenya Amendment Bill 2008. Like many Kenyans, I followed the proceedings keenly until I realized why they doze off. Speeches and legal lingo can bore even the most resilient.

I learned a lot though from Mwangi Kiunjuri, especially about the Frensh Reforusion. (Reminds me of a certain pucher who of late has gone off radar. Not that I miss her though). Parliament that day reminded me of opening day in my early school. Lots of hugs, kisses, animated prattle……... good old days. But beyond opening day and dozing in class, we have nothing else in common with my leaders. Oh! and the monos! I picked out a few wide-eyed monos in parliament. In my school we were not packed on benches like sardines. One bench sat two, a boy and a girl. Our classes were spacious and well ventilated. The contractor forgot to come back and fix doors and windows, leaving huge gaping spaces instead. At the risk of sending them deeper into slumber, I suggest that our parliamentarians borrow a leaf from our Tanzanian neighbours who make their laws atop comfortable swivel chairs. Or Rwanda where members use computers in parliament.
A girl is allowed to deviate from matters of great national importance to appreciate a well dressed Prime Minister Designate. I’m no fashionista but in my view, Raila Amolo Odinga looked hot! If you thought colour pink is all cotton candy, bubble gum and babies, think again. There is something alluring about pink. Maybe that’s because psychologically it is known to have a calming effect. In fashion land, a man who wears pink exudes confidence, yet is sensitive. By combining pink with a dark, well tailored suit (probably fedexed straight from Armani headquarters), Raila did his upcoming position justice. I’ve since forgiven him for wearing ugly socks to the beach a few weeks back. No comparisons here but if we made Michuki’s wife apologize for his torn socks, Ida deserves Kudos for Agwambo’s elegance. She may have saved the tax payer a state sponsored stylist for the PM.

I wish I could have equally rosy words for all other Members some of whom deserve a bed in the fashion casualty ward.

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Horror from African Safari: Gory scene not fit for TV as lions fail to find their usual prey

Food can kill you: Conclusive evidence shows that this famous rich man ate himself to death

Husband cuts off wife’s two arms up to the elbow for failing to give birth to a boy
Introducing Dawa Ya Kumekucha (D.K.)

Posted: March 21, 2008, 3:21 am by chris