Wilde Yearnings

• It is how it is... of boobs, moobs and general chit chat

  Posted: March 18, 2009, 2:27 pm by Wildeyearnings

  
  or Conversations with a Gay Man:
  
  Introducing Kim and Wamz: Together we make up the troika of fabulousness.
  
  Kim and Wamz are both straight. Kim's been married for five years, Wamz is one of those Kenyan confirmed-bachelors (read player).
  
  I’ve known Wamz all my life and Kim for about 10 years now. I love ‘em to bits but that doesn’t stop them ribbing me every now and then about my sexuality. All in good fun of course and no malice in it.
  
  At the pub last night, after getting ourselves thoroughly mellowed, we got into a very interesting conversation, set off by an observation from Kim about an article in one of the daily’s on sex ( heterosexual sex that is).
  
  Kim wanted to know what body parts attracted us first - i.e in Nairobi-speak, were we 'boob' men or 'booty men'? Amused I opted out of this conversation for obvious reasons and watched the lads fight it out. However they didn't let me off the hook for too long.
  
  Wamz turns to me and wants to know if I missed out on all the benefits of being attracted to the opposite sex, me being gay and all.
  
  Amused, I pointed out that I'd probably get more that he ever would and that sometimes gay men didn't have to go through the whole ceremony of flirt, impress, woo, seduce, then either score or strike-out. Sometimes its was easy as making a try at the first effort. (excuse the rugby-speak).
  
  They both nodded at this and looked at me a little bit enviously.
  
  “I wish I was gay.” Wamz sighed, more than a little envious.
  
  “Me too,” Kim agreed, “I would be gay but I don’t think that I could give up the boobs. If only men had boobs.”
  
  “What you need,” Wamz replied, “Is a fat man. With man- boobs. Moobs.”
  
  “Ooh like Jack Black!” Kim smirks.
  
  “Do you miss boobs?” Kim asks me.
  
  I shrug, “Not especially.”
  
  “You never were a boob man though were you?” Wamz asks, “I mean M (my ex-girl friend back in my teens) was hardly Pamela Anderson.”
  
  "Maybe it was his subconscious telling him that he's more of a cock man." Kim suggests.
  
  
  I love my friends.

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